10 Definitive Reasons Against Gay Marriage

There are at least ten definitive reasons why gay people shouldn’t marry.

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Love, Violence, and Other People

The Complete Lockpick Pornography is a provocative title, and the rest of the book doesn’t let that go. While the book is neither pornography nor an instruction manual on lock picking, in some ways it has elements of both. It is two novellas packaged as one—Lockpick Pornography and We All Got It Coming—by Joey Comeau. They do contain swearing and sex and violence, as befits a book of this title, but they also have a considerable dose of human emotion and societal reflection.

On the outside, the two novellas appear to be very different. The first, Lockpick Pornography, follows a nameless protagonist whose main agenda seems to be as queer as possible—and not let little things like laws or other people stand in his way. A little bit more elaboration on this—during the course of the novella, he calls a random woman out of the phone book to challenge her conceptions of gender; he crashes a lesbian prom in disguise to trick them into kissing a man; he and his friends break into buildings wearing masks of queer cartoon characters (Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street, for instance). Lockpick is very much an angry story, ferocious even, with a protagonist who seems determined to take revenge on a world he considers to be too restrictive.

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Commentary Ticker

  • Different Strokes for Different Folks: How Masturbation Divides Us
    May 24, 2013 | 7:10 pm

    Without a doubt, the vast majority of people will engage in masturbation over the course of their lifetimes. May, even, is National Masturbation Month. Yet self-pleasure still remains a divisive issue, as it has for some time, and moreover, the question of its role forms the basis for much of the cultural divide in our [...]

  • You Think You’re So Pretty: What Dove’s ‘Sketches’ Video Got Wrong
    May 23, 2013 | 5:02 pm

    “I should be more grateful of my natural beauty” one woman concludes after participating in the Dove Beauty Sketches. In fact, the woman, Florence concludes that natural beauty “couldn’t be more critical to your happiness.” Florence came to these undesirable conclusions through participation in a commercial released as part of Dove’s campaign to promote “real [...]

  • The Story of the Slurpee
    May 21, 2013 | 5:37 pm

    It might surprise you to hear that the Slurpee was an accident. Yet the beloved concoction, as a matter of fact, got its start when a Dairy Queen soda machine kept on malfunctioning. Its operator, Omar Knedlik of Kansas City, placed bottles of soda in his freezer as a failsafe. The bottles came out a [...]

  • We Are More Germ Than Human
    May 16, 2013 | 11:50 pm

    The human body is one of the most fascinating and puzzling ecosystems in the universe, a complex community of cells, germs and microbes that is still being mapped and decoded. Recent discoveries in this field have caused scientists to reevaluate the way we look at our internal functions, and perhaps we aren’t as much ourselves [...]

  • Daft Punk Streams New Album ‘Random Access Memories’
    May 13, 2013 | 1:42 pm

    The robots are back. The internet has been abuzz with hype for Daft Punk’s long awaited follow up to 2005′s Human After All, and today we finally get to hear it. While the official release date is still a week away, iTunes is offering fans the chance to stream all 13 tracks early. Simply follow [...]

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